Armae for a Motorized Shopping Cart

Being on bed rest can be the most stressful rest. To sit and just watch. Before I felt like I was racing to keep ahead and now I feel like the world is flying by. What would I do with out the help of others? It's hard to give up independence or to feel like you owe other something. But then the ability to be independent prevents us from being part of a community. Modern technology and society teaches us to be more independent which in the long term hurts us. For example casual sex is independence and immature love that results in emptiness and loneliness.

The Japanese use a term"armae" which can't be translated into English but in essence means to belong or be loved. In japan the more intimate a relationship the less you show gratitude because gratitude says "I owe you something." I don't agree with not showing gratitude but their attitude is that you give for the greater good of the community or relationship instead of feeling a sense of indebtedness. In general humans experience a sense of wanting to be a part of something more and I think this goes back to our pre-existance. We miss our Heavanly Father and crave a closeness to our family and ancestors. You rarely meet Christians that don't beleive they will be with family in the after-life, even though the LDS church is the only church that validates those deep instincts.

I don't know if this makes any sense, I'm rambling but I'm adjusting to the difference of being dependent and find myself reading great books and pondering deep gospel principles.

I went to the grocery store a month ago with Spencer to stock up on frozen dinners (which by the way are not so good despite what Spencer's childhood memories are). While driving out of the store praying nobody would see me sporting the motorized shopping cart, Spencer dared me to go off the curb and do a wheelie. I laughed so hard it started contractions, mortified by using a wheelchair with the hilariously wimpy beep of a horn and warning sound of the of the reverse gear. Scenes from Seinfeild flashed in my mind of when George fakes disability and ends up racing down the sidewalk on his Jazzie with a hot persuit of angry Jazzie drivers behind him. Some of you know what I'm talking about and are laughing too.

I need to learn a little armae with wheelchairs if I plan on going to the store again in the next couple of months.